Love Challenge Schedule

Friends! I hope you had a good day loving on yourself! You are wonderful just the way you are, please don't forget it! Here's a sample of what I love about myself:

My red hair
My stubborness and strong will (while sometimes annoying, it can also be so useful!)
Being single - finally, I love it. :)
My muscles. haha.
My diverse friendships (age, race, gender, faith, hobbies, etc.)


Okay so what's next?? Below is a brief description of the schedule for the month. I will try my best to post daily, but may not be able to, so this is the blog post to refer to in order to keep up with the challenge!

Saturday, May 2: Love the Outdoors - spend some time outside today! The longer the better. Busy day? Anyone can squeeze in 5 minutes to go outside and smell the roses!

Sunday, May 3: Love your Friends! Tell a few friends why you love them. Go beyond generic compliments, get all deep and meaningful and mushy.

Monday, May 4: Love Coffee! It's Monday y'all. Coffee. Have that caffeinated bevarage that you love to get, but you rarely get it because of the cost or the calories? Today's the day my friend, get that double-shot Caramel Macchiato with extra whip cream.

Tuesday, May 5: Love your Health! Do something for your health - exercise, buy healthy food, make a commitment to exercise 3 days per week, cut out desserts for a month (maybe in June after my birthday craziness). Do something - anything - to better your health.

Wednesday, May 6: Love Games!  I'm going to try and find a last minute place to do those random game nights with a bunch of random people... Stay tuned. Will hopefully have more info by Sunday night. Can't join the game night? Play some sort of game with a friend or waste some time playing solitaire. Why? Because it's fun, and fun is good for us. :)

Thursday, May 7: Love Traveling! Go somewhere new. Pick a place and a date. Make it happen. It can be a 1-day nearby getaway, or a 2-week vacation. You know you want to!!

Friday, May 8: Love the Avengers Movie! Come with me to see this movie. I love this series and I know you do to! I'll be making an event page with more details soon!

Saturday, May 9: Love a Stranger! Go through a drive-thru and pay for the person behind you. Give passer-by a (non-creepy) compliment. Buy a small bouquet of flowers and give them away to someone.

Sunday, May 10: Love your Mom! Love on your momma today. I know this can be difficult for some, especially if your mom isn't around anymore. So for those of you who don't like today, do what you need to do to feel the love. Bring loved ones around you, love someone who has been a mother-figure to you, or take some time to honor your mom.

Monday, May 11: Love Chocolate! (or your indulgence of choice) It's Monday again. How did that happen? Have some chocolate. :)

Tuesday, May 12: Love Hugs! I've learned over the years that touch is really important to me, and hugs can really make my day. Hug some people today. If you aren't a fan of hugging, just think, the person next to you might be... give them a hug to spread the love.

Wednesday, May 13: Love Growth! Either choose a bad habit to get rid of, or choose a good habit to add. Growth can be difficult, but is oh-so-good for us. Decide today to grow. You don't have to switch overnight, but pick something and go for it!

Thursday, May 14: Love DuPar's Pancakes! Okay. So I'm not a pancake person, but I LOVE DuPar's buttermilk pancakes!! Join me in Pasadena at 8am if you can!

Friday, May 15: Love Your Neighbor! Do something nice for your neighbor. Mow their lawn, give them a card, bake them cookies, knock on their door and say hi... reach out to them in some way.

Saturday, May 16: Love Poker! Okay, I love Texas Hold'em. So join me this night if you can for some fun $5 buy-in poker. More details to come.

Sunday, May 17: Love Sabbath! Take a day off. Like completely off. No plans, no errands, nothing. Rest.

Monday, May 18: Love Your Co-Workers! Okay, it's Monday again. (Does this happen every week?) It's likely your co-workers are feeling it to. Do something for them today, like bring a yummy snack, plan a happy-hour, pass out thank you notes. Help make Monday "Funday"!

Tuesday, May 19: Love Reconciliation! Okay this one is tough, but so important. Forgive someone today. Maybe you can do it face-to-face, or maybe you need to simply let go of something. Let it go and forgive.

Wednesday, May 20: Love... Me? It's my birthday, everyone. Lol. I really don't know what to say for this one. Let's call it a free day. Do whatever you want to spread the love!

Thursday, May 21: Love Service! Volunteer somewhere, or at least choose a place or type of place to volunteer and make a plan! Service is good for your soul and your community. Let's work together to make the world a better place. :)

Friday, May 22: Love Celebrating!!! Party time! More details to come. It will very likely be at some cool bar somewhere. Anyone have any suggestions?

Saturday, May 23: Love Family! We already specifically loved on our moms, but don't forget the rest of the family! If they are far away, give them a call. If they are close by, maybe try to spend some time with them and load on the love!

Sunday, May 24: Love Prayer/Meditation! I find that a good chunk of time in prayer helps realign my body and my soul. Take at least an hour to pray or meditate. Really slow down and get quite, put your thoughts out, and listen.

Monday, May 25: Love New Things! How come Monday is back?? Let's add a twist and try something new. Pick something new to you, and make a plan to do it. Anywhere from sky-diving to trying that dish on the menu you never get. Shake it up.

Tuesday, May 26: Love Intentionality! It can be so easy to go through the days and weeks, just dealing with what you need to do and interacting with who is in front of you. Be intentional today, and reach out to whoever comes to mind. Give them a call and catch up!

Wednesday, May 27: Love Learning! Ever wanted to learn Spanish, figure out how to fix that wobbly thingamajigger, or read a particular book? Today is the day, people. Commit to it!

Thursday, May 28: Love to Meet a Need! Pick a cause that you want to support, and support it! Whether it is local or international, there are some great organizations who could use your support through prayer, money, service, spreading the word, etc.

Friday, May 29: Love Goals! Add some goals to your bucket list, or make a plan to check off some goals!

Saturday, May 30: Love Sailing! (or the ocean) So you all know I'm crazy about sailing. Not everyone is a sailor, but everyone has access to the ocean. It is so wonderful! Go enjoy it today.

Sunday, May 31: Love Gratefulness! This is the end! Take some time to reflect on the things you are grateful for.  You only live once, friends. So keep living, loving, and being grateful for this life.

Love Challenge Day 1 - Love Yourself

Life can be hard.  Work, responsibilities, disappointments, external challenges, internal challenges. Life can be hard.

But YOU are awesome. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are exactly where you need to be and you are going to better places.

I thought we would start this 31-Day love challenge very simply. Today we love ourselves.

Being a perfectionist and always having a desire to do better, I can be pretty tough on myself. But today I choose to love myself.

Take some time today to write down all the things you love about yourself. Be kind and generous in your compliments. Pour it on thick and make a looooong list. Get stuck? Ask a friend or loved one to help you.  You deserve it, because you are lovable and you are loved.

Please, if you are willing, share some or all of your list on this post or on the Facebook page. The more shares, the merrier!

Love you all :)

LET THE LOVE CHALLENGE BEGIN!! 


P.S. If you don't know what this is about, check out my previous blog here.  I will be posting a schedule, hopefully tonight of the themes of the next 30 days as well.

Beth's Birthday Love Challenge

This May I turn 31.

It just so happens that there are also 31 days in May. :)

If you know me at all, you know I like to celebrate and throw big birthday shin-digs. This year I want focus on what is important in life. It isn't relationship status, social status, or achievements, but what is most important is love.

Matthew 22:37-39: "Jesus replied: Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself."

Love God
Love others
Love yourself

In the spirit of focusing on loving God, others and myself, I am doing a 31-Day Love Challenge for my birthday! :)

Will you join me??

I will post a schedule of what to focus on each day. Many of the items you can do on your own, some of them we can do together. A lot of them are silly little birthday shenanigans because I love that sort of thing. You can challenge yourself to do all 31 days, or just choose the ones you like. Some will be easy, some will be hard, many will be fun!

Not a Christian? That's okay! For the God-focused days I will be creating substitutes for those who have different beliefs.

If you are on Facebook, please join my Facebook group, Beth's Birthday Love Challenge. There you will be able to post pictures and share stories about your love adventures, as well as find information about some birthday challenges we can do together.

If you aren't on Facebook, then simply follow this blog. I will use it to post updates, and you can comment on my posts to share your experiences.

I am so excited about this and really hope you can join me!!

Happy Love Day

I've never had a boyfriend or date on Valentine's Day.

With outside pressures and my desire for dating and marriage, Valentine's day became a 24-hour period of commercialism and over-the-top PDA (public displays of affection) that rubbed salt in my singleness wounds. Somewhere along the way, I adopted the phrase "Singleness Awareness Day" to try and acknowledge us singles who didn't have a boo to love on. But that did little to appease my distaste for the retched holiday.

Finally, thankfully, I have turned a new leaf.  As I have entered into a new season in my life, where I actually like being single and am grateful for the life I have, my view of Valentine's Day has transformed.

To my single friends of the world, young and old, male and female, always single or single again: 
We can still have love. Love is not reserved for couples. 

My current favorite verses come from 1 John 4: 11 & 12: "Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God, but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us."

When we love each other, we experience God in a deeper way. When we love each other, we are made more complete.

So who can you love today? Family? Friends? Maybe you need to start with yourself. Or maybe you are feeling adventurous and could do an act of love to a complete stranger - pay for the food of the person behind you in line, give someone walking by a flower, or give a gift to your neighbor.

Let's change the perspective of this day from "Happy Couples Day" to "Happy Love Day." As you go out there in the world of pinks and reds, roses, chocolate, desperate romantic movies and PDA, remember that everyone, even couples, can use some more love. And you have the ability to do something about that.

Spread the love, my friends.

A Request for the Men

Okay guys, I have a request for you.

Today while I was buying a pizza at Blaze, one of the pizza makers looked at me and with a wide smile on his face said, "Has anyone ever told you you look like a prettier Amy Schumer? I mean, she's pretty, but you are even prettier!"

While I don't advise comparing women to each other, this young man made my day. He gave me a kind-hearted compliment with no agenda. He didn't ask for my number, expect me to say anything in return, or make me feel nervous. He simply gave his compliment and moved on.   


Can moments like these happen more often? Please? Pretty please with a cherry on top?

Innocent, friendly compliments like the one I received today are so simple and effective. When I left the restaurant, pizza in hand, I had a bigger smile on my face and an extra kick in my step. I felt just a little bit prettier, a little more appreciated, and a little bit lighter.  Unfortunately, an agenda-free, creep-free compliment from a random man has only happened to me twice in my life. TWICE.

You probably heard of the girl who walked around in New York City for 10 hours with a hidden camera. Here is a link if you want to watch the video. She received over 100 catcalls, not counting whistles and winks. Men gave her "compliments" and many of them were upset with her when she wouldn't talk to them or smile. This is, sadly, a common scenario - one that most women have experienced countless times. These comments make us feel unsafe and dirty, with a sudden desire to feel invisible and get away as quickly as possible.

GUYS, you can help drown out the catcalls and whistles. You can tell women they are valuable, beautiful and appreciated. You can remind women that there are still kind men in the world.

Here are some tips to get you started:

1. Hopefully you already give words of affirmation to your close female friends, but if you don't, start there. The women in your life need to be reminded that they are appreciated, valued and loved. They most likely get a lot of compliments from other women in their life, but they might not hear it from men.
2. Don't go up to a random woman and comment on her looks. That is creepy. Instead, say something affirmative or encouraging to a woman who you are already interacting with, like the woman at the register, the telemarketer on the phone, or the lady next to you in line.
3. If you are afraid about coming across creepy, try giving random words of affirmation to female strangers while you are with female company. When she sees you are with other women, she will feel more safe and won't assume you are hitting on her.
4. Notice something about her, then compliment her on it. For example, "I really like those earrings," "You should know that you are really beautiful, just the way you are," or "you have really nice eyes."
5. If you can say something that isn't about her looks, that is even better! The other day, my friend said a man she hardly knows told her she is a wonderful woman and deserves only the best. That statement of affirmation made a big impact on her. You can also compliment them when you see them doing a good job at work, or exhibiting an admirable personality trait.
6. See a woman who looks discouraged or sad? Say something to cheer her up!
7. Once you have given your compliment, move on. Don't wait for a reply or expect a smile in return. Just give her the gift and move on. If you linger, then she might start thinking you are creepy.

I am really serious about this. Please give it a try and see the results for yourself. Consult the women in your life for further advice, or leave comments below. Also, let us know what women can do to encourage the men we randomly encounter. Maybe we can change the world, one positive, affirmative, cross-gender interaction at a time.

Meet Singleness, the Scapegoat

I am guilty.

Guilty of accusing a harmless relationship status of all my problems.

Unhappy on Valentine's Day? Well maybe I would like it if I had a boyfriend...
Only person at the wedding without a date? Would be nice if I had a husband...
Feeling lonely on a Friday night? If only I wasn't single...

It is so easy to blame singleness for unhappiness. I mean, why not? Society has told us to do so. T.V shows, movies, and music are constantly reminding us that relationships create joy and fix loneliness. Friends with significant others give us sympathy when they find out we are single. Christian culture perpetuates the idea that marriage is better than singleness. And as if outside pressures aren't enough, our physical bodies crave intimate touch and our hearts crave intimate connection.

For a couple of years now, I have been aware that singleness has gotten a bad reputation in the world. However it is only recently I realized I have been using it as a scapegoat, blaming it for all of my unhappiness. My dissatisfaction was never the fault of my singleness.  

Last Friday, I fell into the horrid pit of loneliness that all singles fear. I was alone with no plans and no one to talk to. It was Thanksgiving weekend and for all I knew, all my single friends were out of town. What now? Do I try to entertain myself? Do I wallow in self pity? Do I search for a friend, at the risk of being told they were out of town, or worse - that they already had plans?

I immediately began to wish for a boyfriend. If I had a boyfriend, I would be fine! But then my passion for learning to be content grabbed hold and shook me to my senses.

Singleness does not equate to loneliness.
Marriage does not equate to a lack of loneliness.
Boyfriends do not equate to happiness.
My relationship status was not to blame, my fear of "not fitting in" was the culprit.

After realizing my insecurity was unfounded, I contacted a few friends to find something to do. Within minutes I was on the road, picking up a friend to see a movie. Loneliness averted.

And so, I have decided to turn a new leaf. I'm throwing caution to the wind and releasing my scapegoat from captivity. I'm asking deeper questions to get to the root of the problem and not using singleness as an excuse. I challenge my single and married readers to do the same - the next time you wish for a significant other (or to be single again), ask yourself if that is really the issue. Maybe you just need to reach out to a friend, hug someone, or work out a conflict. Maybe you need to address an unhealthy insecurity. Maybe you need to take better care of yourself. I am willing to bet that you don't need a girlfriend, boyfriend, or separation to fix the problem.

1 + His Goodness = Content

I have not done singleness well.

I've spent a lot of time wondering when I will get married and to whom. I’ve looked for love in wrong places, been angry at God for not giving me someone to be with and made really bad relationship choices to keep from being lonely. I’ve tried to control the matter by joining every online dating service known to man and forcing people to set me up with their friends. Briefly, very briefly, I swore off men, deciding I didn’t need them at all ever again.

All the while, I couldn’t understand why God – who is supposed to be good – would allow me to go through this life alone and keep me from being in a relationship. “You gave Adam a companion, why not me?”

Then the math-lover in me realized something wasn’t adding up. Either God wasn’t actually good, or I was looking at this all wrong. Since God has proven himself to be good - in scripture, among my friends and in other areas in my own life – then I had it wrong. There must be a way to be content in singleness.

And so I have begun, slowly and methodically, to understand how I got to this place of discontent and how to get to a place of satisfaction – where I can embrace and enjoy this life God has given to me, living it to the fullest.

I’m not there yet, but I am getting closer.